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The Lusty Argonian Maid
Summary *'Full title': The Lusty Argonian Maid (In Skyrim: The Lusty Argonian Maid Volume 2) *'Author': Crassius Curio (a character from The Elder Scrolls III: Morrowind) *'Value': 19 (Skyrim: 14) *'Weight':1 Known Locations (Morrowind) *Morrowind Known Locations (Oblivion) *Leyawiin in Southern Books. *Imperial City, found on the body of Gaston Tussaud. *Cheydinhal, the Dark Brotherhood Sanctuary. Ocheeva owns a copy. Amusing, considering she is in fact an Argonian. *Deepscorn Hollow, next to the bed of the Dark Minion. *Gweden Farm, basement in the sleeping area. *Bliss, close to the entrance gate. *Imperial City Waterfront by the Pirates Known Locations (Skyrim) *Honningbrew Meadery, next to the bed in the loft floor (Volume 2). *Haelga's Bunkhouse (Riften), left of the alter of Dibella on the bedstand in Haelga's room (Volumes 1/2). *In a crushed house across the river from the Abandoned Prison. Next to the body of Lucky Lorenz. *Winterhold Jarl's Longhouse, in a room on the second floor. *Riftweald Manor, located in the basement *College of Winterhold Library, in a stack of books. You have to search for it, but it's there. *Driftshade Refuge (Silver Hand hideout), on a bookshelf *Highmoon Hall (Morthal) Underneath Joric's Bed. *In the bottom of Mercer Frey's house. Contents Act IV, Scene III, continued Lifts-Her-Tail: Certainly not, kind sir! I am here but to clean your chambers. Crantius Colto: Is that all you have come here for, little one? My chambers? Lifts-Her-Tail: I have no idea what it is you imply, master. I am but a poor Argonian maid. Crantius Colto: So you are, my dumpling. And a good one at that. Such strong legs and shapely tail. Lifts-Her-Tail: You embarrass me, sir! Crantius Colto: Fear not. You are safe here with me. Lifts-Her-Tail: I must finish my cleaning, sir. The mistress will have my head if I do not! Crantius Colto: Cleaning, eh? I have something for you. Here. Polish my spear. Lifts-Her-Tail: But it is huge! It could take me all night! Crantius Colto: Plenty of time, my sweet. Plenty of time. END OF ACT IV, SCENE III Volume 2 Act VII, Scene II, Continued Lifts-Her-Tail: My goodness, that's quite a loaf! But how ever shall it fit my oven? Crantius Colto: This loaf isn't ready for baking, my sweet. It has yet to rise. Lifts-Her-Tail: If only we could hurry that along. How would I accomplish such a task? Crantius Colto: Oh, my foolish little Argonian maid, you must use your hands. Lifts-Her-Tail: You wish me to knead the loaf? Here? Crantius Colto: Of course. Lifts-Her-Tail: But what if the mistress catches me? Your loaf was meant to satisfy her appetite. Crantius Colto: Don't fret, my delicate flower. I'll satisfy the mistress' cravings later. Lifts-Her-Tail: Very well, but I'm afraid my oven isn't hot enough. It could take hours! Crantius Colto: Plenty of time, my sweet. Plenty of time. End of Act VII, Scene II Notes *In The Elder Scrolls III: Morrowind and The Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion, this appeared as a single book, however in The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim it appears as two separate volumes: Volume 1, Volume 2. Appearances *The Elder Scrolls III: Morrowind *The Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion *The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim Category:Books Category:Oblivion: Books Category:Morrowind: Books Category:Skyrim: Books